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Miss you 💕@makeupbyawel
I just wanted to take a moment to appreciate some of my favourite looks over the last 7 months...
When I set up my account in July of last year I never expected such incredible support. I’m so grateful to each and every one of you for every like, comment, save or share. It’s no secret that I’ve neglected this account over the last couple of months, my absence has made me realise that whilst Instagram did grow my love for makeup, sadly it has also started to take it away.
Because my account grew fairly quickly (far quicker than I expected at least) I wanted to take what was initially just a bit of fun a little more seriously, with the hope that one day I’d be lucky enough to get the opportunity to work with some of my favourite brands.
Unfortunately, I gave in and became far too obsessive and fixated on the numbers when the algorithm took a turn for the worse sometime in mid October. Of course, things are even worse now. I also spent way too much time on my phone and neglected things in my real life. Even though I enjoyed makeup, on a subconscious level I probably enjoyed it a lot more at first knowing that I was being seen by thousands of people. Hence why the thought of creating something now doesn’t excite me as much, as it can sometimes take so long to do even one look (yes, even on just the one eye!) and it’s especially disheartening if it’s a look you’re particularly proud of. I know many can carry on and just not focus on the numbers, I really wish I was like that and I envy those people, but it seems I’m the type that equates engagement or reach with self worth / talent etc which is obviously not the case and is not healthy.
I don’t really know what the point of this post is, I guess I just wanted to explain why I’m absent and why I’ll likely continue to be absent until I feel ready to come back. I somehow need to accept that my account may be dying, but that my love for makeup shouldn’t necessarily have to die because of it.
Despite the shitty algorithm, Instagram has given me so much joy and I’ve met so many incredible artists, many of which I’d call friends 💕
Soz for the essay. Bye for now